This Horrible feeling

I am a horrible person. I am sitting here on my couch, watching "High Fidelity" starring John Cusak (Spelling?), skipping church this morning because I was too tired because I laid awake in bed last night following a story line (it was really good, too) and so I was up till 3 in the morning last night, and when my alarm went off this morning, I laid awake, perfectly awake, but still a tinge of tired, thinking, I'm too tired to get out of bed to go to church. even to get up and wear my favorite dress to church. I was too tired.
Iam a heathen. I skipped church, for the second week in a row, because I was a TWINGE too tired to get my lazy *** out of bed. Ugh, I hate myself.
I'm making mac and cheese. My alarm dinged that the pasta was ready. Its sitting in front of me, delicious. and it makes me feel more guilty. I skipped church, it screams at me. I'm in my jean shorts and a shirt, and they are screaming at me "you skipped church" and my bible is on the coffee table, unopened, untouched. Its screams at me.
I hate myself.

Shae